


My last wish

by Iodice457



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Cancer, Character Death, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:02:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24654289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iodice457/pseuds/Iodice457
Summary: A letter levi wrote if he loses his battle with cancer
Relationships: Levi & Eren Yeager, Levi/Eren Yeager
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	My last wish

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic ever. And english is not my first language so be kind and feel free to point out any mistakes or thing you would have written differently
> 
> Enjoy

15 years ago i first landed my eyes on you. We were strangers, but a strange feeling was already bothering me; I ignored it. If everybody calls you heartless there has to be a reason.   
Or at least that's what I kept telling myself, suppressing that feeling.  
The same day your eyes landed on me, too. Those green eyes, I would never forget. After a while, you talked to me, I was an asshole, still am, but you saw something in me and you asked me out.   
In that moment I wanted to smile, but of course, I didn't, I played it cool, but you saw right through me.

5 years after that we were engaged, I asked you. I could never forget that moment, we were so... Happy.   
I was so nervous, for a moment i thought i would wait for you to propose. I was about to chicken out. And than you came back home, and I saw the look on your face when your eyes landed on me, and I knew I was being stupid. The next hours I was a ball of nerves, of course you noticed, but you let it go. After dinner I started to feel nervous again; it was now or never. I got on my knee, looked you in the eyes, those wonderful eyes, and I started telling how much I loved you (still, and always will love you), you were crying, I was smiling so wide, and than you said yes, a tear escape my eye. I thought this was the best day of my life. And I was wrong I was so wrong. 

A year later we got married and that was truly the best day of my life. 

9 years from that day and I still am a happy man, I will always be, as long as I have you.   
9 years from that day and I got diagnosed whit cancer. 

This, is the letter if I don't make it. I probably won't, the chance are low, but a man can hope, right?

Other than my past as a thug I never told you of the days before our encounter, that's because they don't matter. I was a robot, a heartless bastard. I had suppressed all my feelings, I didn't want to be hurt anymore.   
if you don't feel you can't get hurt, right?  
I was kind of right, but the life I was in, wasn't worth living. I wasn't living, I was a machine. I worked, eat and hardly slept. I was rude to keep everyone away from me. I almost accomplished my mission. Why almost? Because of Hanje, even if I threatened them, insult them, ignore them, they would keep coming back to bother me. I secretly loved her (still do). She was my only true friend, I liked it that way. But even with a friend my life still wasn't worth living. Until I met you. I will never stop being grateful to hanje for dragging me to that cafe. You are my all world, I will never stop loving you.  
You gave a meaning to my life.

Today, I'm fighting for that same life. I'm fighting one of the worst diseases. And If you're reading this, means that I lost my last battle.   
I found it kind of funny, a soldier, the best soldier of the regiment probably of the country, after winning dozens of battles, saving lives, and ending others, losses against a fucking disease without having the possibility of doing anything about it.   
It's fucking hilarious   
And actually I'm angry, I am so fucking angry, because I don't want to let go, I don't want to die, I don't want to leave you. And the best thing is that I don't have a say in this. I can only wait, do the chemo, the surgery and fucking wait, hoping for it to get better or worst.   
I think I never desired something so strongly in my life.   
There's nothing I would do to extend my life with you. NOTHING. 

But hoping, desiring, is not enough, is never enough, it won't take my disease away, it won't make me stay with you. So why keep hoping if it's useless? I really don't know, but I can't help myself. I keep dreaming about our future if I win this battle. Which I didn't so why did I hope? 

Happiness never lasts, does it?  
Anyhow  
Right now I have a wish for you.

KEEP LIVING. 

Not the way I did, live a life worth living, for the both of us. You're young, you have still a lot to live so DO IT. I know is painfull, I know it seem like it's never getting better, but it will.   
You trust me, right?

God, you may even find someone else to love. I'm not saying you will, but I really wish you happiness. So do whatever it takes to keep you happy. That's my wish, my last wish.

PLEASE, BE HAPPY   
Love you

-Levi Ackerman 

P.s tell shitty glasses I love her.


End file.
